Not Feeling Myself

This is how I'm feeling right about now! Let me tell you folks this week has been crap! I've had the worst week at work, new management pissed me off! I won't even get into that one! I guess it just went down hill from there really! I know when that "special" time of the month is approaching i can be irritable and extra sensitive but i swear with hand on heart that this is not related...honest!
Like i said it started off with a run in with management, after that i have been pissed off ever since and i just feel like I've had it up to here with my job! Imagine i even got new clothes from New Look and i just haven't been bothered to post about it! I can't wait for my days off next week so i can take a step back and start again! So if your reading this post and thinking what the hells wrong with this girl, forgive me I'm not myself! Just wanted to let you know I'm still here! xoxo

When I'm Bored I Bake

I am bored! right now I have never felt so un-fulfilled with my life! My desire to be doing something creative is starting to grate at me. All I do is work, go home, sleep, eat, wash and go back to work! I am so tired that on my days off I don't want to leave the house!



I feel like I should be someone else because this is not my life, I envy everyone who looks like they are enjoying life the way it was meant! Don't get me wrong I am fortunate to have the life I live, I know others are a lot worse off than me. I have great friends and family who love and support me...BUT...I spend 70% of my time at work doing a job that I don't really enjoy but I do it because it pays well enough not to be living from hand to mouth! I NEED MORE! A co-worker said to me as I was leaving for a break that I need to chill out as I had at least another 25 yrs to go! That got me thinking, 25 yrs of this shit? I think I might slit my wrists with a spoon! Either I start playing the lottery or I need to start seriously thinking about what I wanna do with my life, where do I wanna be in 25 yrs time? I know for sure I don't want to be in the same place getting yelled at by irate customers!

Realistically what can I do that is gonna pay me as much? I don't have a degree, and these days there is not much you can do without one, plus it has to be something I enjoy more to the point! Everything is so expensive, when your an adult its costly to decide that you want a new way of life.

I've been looking up courses on jewellery making, I love statement jewellery and I would love to create my own. When I was about 15 I used to make rings out of wooden beads and I remember being asked to make a selection to sell on a stall at a fair but because I was 15 I decided that it was too much work and declined (stupid me) anyway I would love to get into that again.

 I just need to be doing something creative even if I am stuck in my job for another 25 yrs at least I would have done something that made me feel happy and fulfilled! Who knows I could be really successful and pack in my day job?! hahaha one step at a time eh!

In the meantime my boredom has turned me into a Delia Smith, baking chocolate cakes like they have been going out of fashion! Not a good hobby to take up when your trying to cut back on the eating! To be fair the last cake I made I didn't eat one slice!